John McClane
Bruce Willis as "John McClane" in Die Hard (1988):
Geronimo, Motherfucker!
John McClane
John McClane
Actor: Bruce Willis (age 33 in this movie)
John McClane's Memorable Quotes:
John McClane
Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker.
John McClane
[McClane watches fire trucks approach the building]C'mon baby, come ta' papa, I'll kiss ya' fuckin' dalmatian.
John McClane

[stealing Tony's shoes]

Nine million terrorists in the world and I gotta kill one with feet smaller than my sister.
John McClane
Welcome to the party, pal.
John McClane
Hans Gruber
You'd have made a pretty good cowboy yourself, Hans.Oh, yes. What was it you said to me before? "Yippie-ki-yay, motherfucker."
John McClane
[John is fighting Karl] You should have heard your brother squeal when I broke his fucking neck.
John McClane
Geronimo, Motherfucker!
John McClane
Happy trails, Hans.
John McClane

[after entering the room where Gruber retains Holly]

Hi, honey.
John McClane

[huddled in an air vent, recalls his wife's invitation]

"Come out to the coast, we'll get together, have a few laughs..."
John McClane
[fighting Karl] You motherfucker, I'm gonna kill you! I'm gonna fuckin' cook you, and I'm gonna fucking eat you!
Hans Gruber
John McClane
Karl
[Hans' radio turns on] I thought I told all of you, I want radio silence until further...Ooooh, I'm very sorry Hans. I didn't get that message. Maybe you should've put it on the bulletin board. I figured since I've waxed Tony and Marco and his friend here, I figured you and Karl and Franco might be a little lonely, so I wanted to give you a call.How does he know so much about th...

[silences Karl him with a gesture]

That's very kind of you. I assume you are our mysterious party crasher. You are most troublesome, for a security guard.Eeeh! Sorry Hans, wrong guess. Would you like to go for Double Jeopardy where the scores can really change?

[speaking to dead man about cigarettes]

Whoa, these are very bad for you.Who are you then?Just a fly in the ointment, Hans. The monkey in the wrench. The pain in the ass.
Hans Gruber
John McClane
[on the radio] Mr. Mystery Guest? Are you still there?Yeah, I'm still here. Unless you wanna open the front door for me.Uh, no, I'm afraid not. But, you have me at a loss. You know my name but who are you? Just another American who saw too many movies as a child? Another orphan of a bankrupt culture who thinks he's John Wayne? Rambo? Marshal Dillon?Was always kinda partial to Roy Rogers actually. I really like those sequined shirts.Do you really think you have a chance against us, Mr. Cowboy?Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker.
Hans Gruber
John McClane
This time John Wayne does not walk off into the sunset with Grace Kelly.That was Gary Cooper, asshole.
John McClane

[while crawling through a narrow ventilation shaft]

Now I know what a TV dinner feels like.
John McClane
Argyle
Richard Thornburg

[last lines]

Merry Christmas, Argyle.Merry Christmas.[to the camera] Did ya get that?

[Argyle shuts the limo door]

If this is their idea of Christmas, I *gotta* be here for New Year's.
John McClane
[before jumping from the roof] I promise I will never even *think* about going up in a tall building again. Oh, God. Please don't let me die.
John McClane

[Tying fire hose around his waist]

Oh, John, what the fuck are you doing? How the fuck did you get into this shit?
Hans Gruber
John McClane

[after bad guys hit police ram with rocket]

[in radio to bad guys]

Hit it, again.[in radio to Hans] Hans you motherfucker, you made your point! Let them pull back![in radio to McClaine] Thank you, Mr. Cowboy, I'll take it under advisement.

[to bad guys]

*Hit it, again.*
John McClane
[first lines]

[Businessman]: You don't like flying, do you?

What gives you that idea?

[Businessman]: You wanna know the secret to surviving air travel? After you get where you're going, take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on the rug bare foot and make fists with your toes.

Fists with your toes?

[Businessman]: I know, I know, it sounds crazy. Trust me, I've been doing it for nine years. Yes sir, better than a shower and a hot cup of coffee.

Okay.

[the businessman sees John's gun]

It's okay, I'm a cop. Trust me, I've been doing this for eleven years.
John McClane
[Supervisor]:[as McClane tries to call up police] Attention, whoever you are, this channel is reserved for emergency calls only. No fucking shit, lady. Does it sound like I'm ordering a pizza?
John McClane
Joseph Yoshinobu Takagi
You throw quite a party. I didn't realize they celebrated Christmas in Japan.Hey, we're flexible. Pearl Harbor didn't work out so we got you with tape decks.
John McClane
Let's see you take *this* under advisement, jerkweed!
Hans Gruber
Richard Thornburg
Thornburg's Assistant
Sgt. Al Powell
Harry Ellis
John McClane
Touching, Cowboy, touching. Or should I call you, Mr. McClane? Mr. Officer John McClane of the New York Police Department?Get on the phone to Harry in New York. Come on, baby, move, move.Got it.Better get a hold of somebody in dispatch.Sister Teresa called me Mr. McClane in the third grade. My friends call me John, and you're neither, shit-head.I have someone who wants to talk to you; a very special friend who was with you at the party tonight.[Hans hands him the walkie talkie] Hey, John boy.Ellis?Yeah. Now listen, John, they're giving me a few minutes to try to talk some sense into you. I know you think you're doing your job, John, and I can appreciate that, but, you're just dragging this thing out. Now look, no one gets outta here until these guys can talk to the *LA* police, and that just ain't gonna happen until you stop messin' up the works, capisci?Ellis, what have you told them?I told 'em we were old friends and you were my guest at the party.Ellis, you shouldn't be doin' this.Tell me about it. Alright, John, listen. They want you to tell them where the detonators are. They know people are listening. They want the detonators or they're gonna kill me.

[pause]

John, didn't you hear me?Yeah, I hear you.Hey, John, I think you can get with the program a little, huh? The police are here now, it's their problem. Now tell these guys where the detonators are so no one else gets hurt, you know I'm putting my life on the line for you, pal.Ellis, listen to me very carefully.John?Shut up Ellis, just shut your mouth! Put Hans back on the line.

[Ellis holds the walkie talkie up]

Hans, this shit-head does not know what kind of man you are, but I do. Listen to me!Good. Then, you'll give us what we want and save your friend's life. You're not part of this equation this time, you realize that.

[presents his gun]

Hey, what am I, a method actor? Hans, babe, put away the gun, this is radio, not television.[nervously yelling] Hans, this asshole is not my friend, I just met him tonight, I don't know him. Jesus Christ, Ellis these people are gonna kill you, tell them, you don't know me.John, how can you say that after all these years, huh? John?

[gets no response]

John?

[still gets no response, then laughs slightly, then Hans shoots him in the head]

[he puts the walkie talkie up to the screaming crowd, then yells into the walkie talkie] You hear that? Talk to me, where are my detonators? Where are they, or shall I shoot another one? Sooner or later, I might get to someone you *do* care about!Go fuck yourself, Hans.
John McClane
Sgt. Al Powell

[after McClane sets off massive explosion]

Is the building on fire?No, but it's gonna need a paint job and a shit load of screen doors.
John McClane

[after witnessing Mr. Takagi's murder]

[talking to himself]

Why the fuck didn't you stop 'em, John? 'Cause then you'd be dead, too, asshole.
John McClane
Hans Gruber
So that's is what this is about, Hans? A fucking robbery?Put down the gun.Why'd you have to nuke the whole building, Hans?Well, when you steal $600, you can just disappear. When you steal 600 million, they will find you, unless they think you're already dead.
Deputy Police Chief Dwayne T. Robinson
John McClane
I've got a hundred people down here, and they're covered with glass.Glass? Who gives a shit about glass? Who the fuck is this?This is Deputy Chief of Police, Dwayne T. Robinson, and I am in charge of this situation.Oh, you're in charge? Well, I got some bad news for you *Dwayne*, from up here it doesn't look like you're in charge of jack shit.You listen to me, you little asshole, I'm...Asshole? I'm not the one who just got butt-fucked on national TV, *Dwayne*. Now, you listen to me, jerk-off, if you're not a part of the solution, you're a part of the problem. Quit being a part of the fucking problem and put the other guy back on!
Argyle
John McClane
Well, why didn't you come with her man? What's up?'Cause I'm a New York cop. I got a six-month backlog on New York scumbags I'm still trying to put behind bars. I can't just pick up and go that easy.
Hans Gruber
John McClane
[Hans pulls a gun on McClane after impersonating a hostage] Put down the gun, and give me my detonators.Well, well, well... Hans.Put it down now.That's pretty tricky with that accent. You oughta be on fucking TV with that accent. But what do you want with the detonators, Hans? I already used all the explosives. Or did I?I'm going to count to three...Yeah, like you did with Takagi?

[Hans pulls trigger]

Ooops. No bullets. What do you think, I'm fucking stupid, Hans?[elevator opens] You were saying?
John McClane
Tony
Drop it, dickhead. It's the police.You won't hurt me.Oh, yeah? Why not?Because you're a policeman. There are rules for policemen.Yeah. That's what my captain keeps telling me.
Hans Gruber
John McClane
Karl
The following people are to be released from their captors: In Northern Ireland, the seven members of the New Provo Front. In Canada, the five imprisoned leaders of Liberte de Quebec. In Sri Lanka, the nine members of the Asian Dawn movement...[listening on the radio] What the fuck?[mouthing silently] Asian Dawn?[covers the radio] I read about them in Time magazine.
John McClane
But, all things being equal, I'd rather be in Philadelphia.
John McClane
Sgt. Al Powell
These guys are mostly European judging by their clothing labels and...

[long pause]

cigarettes. They're well-financed and very slick.Well, now, how do you know that?I've seen enough phony ID's in my time to recognize that the ones they got must have cost a fortune. Add all that up, I don't know what the fuck it means, but you got some bad-ass perpetrators and they're here to stay.I hear ya, partner. And L.A.'s finest are on it.
John McClane
Son of a bitch! Fist with your toes.
John McClane
Who's driving this car, Stevie Wonder?
John McClane

[cops start coming towards the building]

You macho assholes, no, no!
John McClane
Marco
Henrich

[upon seeing Marco arrive, suspense music plays]

Freeze m*th*rf*cker![panicking] Oh God! Don't shoot! Don't shoot!Drop the gun![starts to do so] Ok! But don't shoot! Don't shoot!Put it on the ground![still doing so but very slowly] I know! But don't shoot! Don't shoot![music changes to a climatic theme as Heinrich comes in] Marco duck!

[John easily shoots Heinrich but Marco manages to take cover. John then hides under a long conference table]

[after a quick scene change Marco is on the table shooting it as he walks down it]

You a dog now. Where you going pal? Soon there will be no more table.

[empties his clip and jams a fresh one in]

Next time you have a chance to kill someone, don't hesitate.

[prepares to start shooting again when... ]

[fires upwards several times riddling Marco with bullets. Marco drops dead on the table with bullets and wood splinters in him]

Thanks for the advice, pal.
John McClane
Hans Gruber

[Getting out a pack of cigarettes]

Do you smoke?[while mimicing a hostage] Yeah.

[McClane hands him the pack of cigarettes]

Thanks. Now, you don't work for Nakatomi, and you're not one of them.I'm a cop from New York.New York?Yeah. I got invited to the Christmas party by mistake. Who knew.

[laughs]

Better being caught with your pants down, huh? I'm John McClane, and you are?[Quickly thinks of a name which he got from a nearby Bulletin board] Clay. Bill Clay.[Takes out his handgun] You now how to use a handgun, Bill?I spent a weekend at a combat ranch. You know where they shoot red paint, but it sounds stupid to you.Well, time for the real thing, Bill. All you gotta do is pull the trigger.
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